Epiphany

I just had an epiphany. I thought I'd share.

I made a phone call to a friend. Instead of being chatty and having an interesting conversation, I announced who I was and rescheduled our arrangement. She said okay. I responded with "Okay. Bye." She hurried a "bye" as well, and I promptly hung up the phone almost walking away before my hand released it. That's when it hit me.

Sometimes, probably most of the time, I am a "no nonsense" kind of girl. That or impatient. Call it what you will. I have long known if I have an idea, I like to begin the process and continue uninterrupted until it is finished. I hate to sleep, eat, or do anything to disrupt my work. Maybe that's why hobbies are rough for me. If I am reading a book, it goes most places with me. If I am sewing, I sleep far too little. I must add that I read too much last week and slept too little. I don't want to change the diaper in the middle of doing the dishes. Moving the laundry is troublesome. Huh. Is it any wonder it sits in a clean pile until I take time to fold it all at the same time. Folding each load after it is finished, which is the best way to manage it, feels like one long chore interrupted by kids, dishes, food, cleaning, reading, sleeping, and everything else. Where is the end? Oh. There is no end. Get it done and leave it finished. It is a nice idea, but nothing in my life stays finished. It is a long list of repetitious acts and tasks.

When applied in appropriate situations, this behavior can be beneficial. I see it hindering me at present. I can drive a project to completion, but I may cut corners to get there sooner and there is no telling who I will bully in the process. Yikes. Now that I know something new about myself. What will I do with the information? This epiphany is turning into a wrench.